No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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