I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Randomize
