i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
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