Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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