Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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