You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
