is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
