Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Randomize
