I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
You are the jesus of drinking
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
