doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
