I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
