There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
