you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
