Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Operation Purity has been aborted
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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