Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Randomize
