shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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