I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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