She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
