what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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