Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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