they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
