my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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