Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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