I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
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