You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
