apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
