i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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