He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
