this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
