I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
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