But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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