Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
