Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize