I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Randomize
