His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Randomize
