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you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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