I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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