They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
