In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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