so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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