The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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