The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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