another moral hangover. fuck.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
