hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
