Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
