Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
it's not cheating when I paid for it
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
