it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
This is the high leading the old right now
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Oh god it's open bar.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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