ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Randomize
