is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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