i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
