I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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