did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
