everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
did i walk over a car last night?
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
