Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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