Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
